Obsession

Last Sunday, Tim was preaching about the first command in the Ten Commandments - Exodus 20:
² “I am the LORD your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery.
 ³ “You shall have no other gods before^[a] me.
 ⁴ “You shall not make for yourself an image in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below. ⁵ You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God.

Back in the days, the Israelites would create an idol to be worshipped. They'd worship and bow down to a golden cow, an image, a statue, and many more. They'd believe in the 'god of rain', 'god of thunder', and this and that. There were many other gods on whom they depended on and brought sacrifices to. It took away the attention from the real God, the God of Abraham. God didn't like that, and therefore He commanded Moses to tell His people to worship only Him, to bring sacrifices to only Him, and to depend only on Him. He is the Creator, He is the mighty one, the one who brought them out of slavery in Egypt, the one who parted the Red Sea, the one who provided them with water in the dessert and manna and quail for food. Therefore He is the only one worth of their worship.

However, in these modern days, an 'idol' may not be in the form of a golden cow, an image or a statue. It could be in many other forms such as work, power, money, sports or hobbies, material thing, a rock band, a partner/spouse/family member or anything at all that could take away our devotion to God. An 'idol' in this modern day is anything that is stopping us from loving Him with all our hearts, minds and strengths.
Basically the question you should ask yourself is... what do you spend most of the time thinking about? What do you spend most of your energy doing?

The funny thing is.... after listening to that message, this week I realise that I might have an 'idol' which I need to get rid of. It becomes quite obvious especially this week as I grew my 'obsession' in a particular thing, a tablet pc. I must confess.... I have been spending all of my free time doing some research about which tab to buy. From the iPads to the Xoom, night after night, the internet has become my very best friend.

When I'm in the car, I'd be calling places, checking out prices in the retail stores. When I'm at home, I'd be on my laptop reading articles and reviews, watching the review videos on youTube. When I'm in the passenger seat, I'd use V's phone to go on the net, browsing and comparing prices. It just goes on and on and on. In the past few weeks, I must have spent at least 2-3 hours per day, which is 21 hours per week, which is over 80 hours in the last month or so, just researching about tablet pc's. It's crazzzzzzzy!

This week, it hits me! OMG, my love and obsession for tabs has overtaken my devotion time with God!!!

A few weeks ago I was stressing out about our home-selling progress, and I often found myself praying and just pouring out my thoughts, feelings, anxieties and all repeatedly to God. Whenever I find myself in solitude, I just start talking to Him and after I poured it all out, I always felt so joyful, happy and peaceful. There's this hunger in me to just keep connecting to Him and 5 mins in His presence just gave me so much joy. After we made some changes to our home-selling arrangement, a huge burden lifted off my shoulder and from about 2 weeks ago I just felt a bit more relaxed about it, which is suppose to be a good thing! But it turned out to be a not-so-good thing afterall, because the lack of stress and anxiety apparently has 'relaxed' my praying muscles quite a bit.

This week I'd find myself in solitude, and instead of feeling that urge and hunger to be connecting to God, I'd be busy doing tab-research-related stuffs. It's not good though. A few times I realise what I was doing and what I could have been doing instead, and I tried to connect to Him the way I used to a few weeks ago, and there's like this big barrier in between us. It's like there's this huge wall and I just cant seem to find Him. I cant seem to connect with Him. I feel like I'm stuck in this blood sucking mud and I need something to just lift me up and out of whatever it is. It might sound crazy, or it might just all be my imagination, but that's just what I feel.

But I believe that "our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." (Eph 6:12) and that the devil can use all sorts of thing to put a distance between us and God. Behind every physical symptoms, there's always the devil working in the spiritual realm.

I'm not saying that it's completely the devil's fault for me being so obsessed with tablet pcs. I believe it's partly my fault for allowing my mind to be so consumed with it. I know we can choose what we want to think about, and I might have made a conscious choice to be thinking about tabs all the time. But I do believe that he contributes to it somehow. Because at the end of the day, all he wants is for me to put my obsession for tabs before my devotion for God.

Anyways, now that I realize what's just happened, all of a sudden it makes sense to me what it actually means to "have no other gods before [Him]", and I'm certainly working and praying hard to destroy my 'idol' and put God as my no.1 obsession again.

So what's your 'god'  ??????????

What are you obsessed about?
What do you spend most of your free time doing?
What do you spend most of your time thinking about?
What would you rather be doing than connecting with Him in prayers, worship and reading His words?
Who/what is your 'god'?